How do I Measure Up?

Ever ask yourself that question?

Truth is I ask myself that everyday...

I am an investor, not financial, but in friendships/relationships........

I invest deeply at times and wonder afterwards, how do I measure up with such in such?

But does it matter?

I'd like to tell you it does not matter to me, but then I would be the one thing I loathe, a liar...

But on the other hand it does not matter to me, or atleast it should not because as long as I know how I measure up with my Lord then all else seems trivial......

God made us, I mean he was the Master Potter and took time out to craft us......

I often read the book 'You are so Special' to Elijah or sometimes I just read it, and in that book Wemmick's worth were measured by stickers, gold stars and gray dots, Wemmick's loathed the gray dots, and longed and envied the ones who only had gold stars......

When I first read that book( a long time ago mind you) I saw myself as a girl covered in dots, no star would find me worthy, but then I thought of the woodcarver Eli, I really reflected, and even though at times I can be tempted into thinking I need those gold stars, that validation of my worth from other people, I know now all I need to worry about is what my Lord who made me thinks, how he measures me, that is all that matters......

Last night I questioned my worth again, I questioned alot of things, found myself in a inner battle, it seemed that the enemy just about won the battle, but I remembered that story, and victory was found yet again.......

I know that there will be battles, questions, and wonders of my worth, my validation with those around me, the truth is when I love either my husband or my friends I love deep, it is the only way I know how to love....

I am just afraid I have perhaps become that little kid who hug the puppy and squeezes too hard.....

Even though I am told I am not, it is a thought I struggle with lately.....

But all in all next time you ask yourself How do I measure up? whether it be with your spouse or friend, remember the story about Punchinello...

Be Well.